“Today is the first day of the rest of your life.”

It’s been a long nine months out of college. Every day, I’ve contemplated what my next life step would be. I’ve thought about joining the green-collars, or to get a part-time job for short-term support while I try to become a full-timer.

Sometimes, I think my legs don’t work. When I run, I feel like I have to pull them up with my hands to go faster. Then I realized that those were dreams that I’ve been having. Dream interpretation says that these dreams signify a lack of self-esteem and self-confidence.

Honestly, these nine months have destroyed my life (with the exception of getting married, of course). There have been times when I just want to rage; punch everyone in the face, and run away to where no one can find me. There were also moments when I’ve been calm; that this is my destiny, and that I will get to where I’m going soon enough.

Today, while I’m not sure if I’m exactly thrilled about getting my retail job, I’ve made an important decision. Joining the military has always been in the back of my mind, ever since my father told me about his experiences while I was a child. After talking with my wife, I now have her full support in trying to go into OCS. This decision, by no means, was easy. Because we were recently married, any life changing decision must be made as a unit, and I’m incredibly lucky to be married to her. So that’s what this is. I’m using my personal Tumblr to document my journey to become a commissioned officer.

I’ve been frequenting the ArmyOCS forums, and from what I gather, I am a competitive candidate. I just need to lose fifteen pounds (which I am already on track at doing), and start to max out my APFT score. Right now, I am at about 195-200, so bringing it up to 300 should work well with the weight loss goal.

The other thing I need to do, is find a recruiter who has done OCS packets. The one I previously talked to was new to recruiting, and while I applaud his effort and enthusiasm about learning the application process, I feel like I do not want to waste any of my chances in joining. So, here’s to tomorrow.

“Take what you can, give nothing back.”